I know it's been a while since you posted to my about forgiveness. You too gave me something to think about particularly your comments about leaving someone because you love them and that's they only way they will get help. I have been trying very hard to help my husband find a job, get mental health help, realizing how he's hurting me and my kids through verbal abuse or hurtful comments. Staying makes me an enabler, because I continue to allow him to get away with unacceptable behaviors. The reason abusive relationships work is that the abuser tells you they love you and try to make you feel guilty and responsible for their behaviors. Or, if they push you to the point that you can barely stand it and they become normal for awhile and because you so desperately want it to be o.k. it never is. I know all of this, yet I've stayed. Your other point is does God want us to be in this situation? You might be right. Maybe the point is trust. Trust in God, trust in our own instincts as a woman. Ironically, I think the reson I have trouble with the trusting part is that I've been hurt so deeply by the very person who next to my parents is supposed to love me more than anyone else so that's the reason for my extreme fear and lack of trust of anyone and anything. Sorry, I am so rambling here, but I feel like I have had somewhat of an epiphany in understanding myself. Thank you! God Bless and do post to me.

Thanks for commenting on my wall. Yes, we do have some similar backgrounds. Its a great release not having to deal with his issues anymore. It is hard now to try to become my own person, but day by day I'm seeing more of me and less of him. For years I lived with the life of his drug issues, little by little gradually taking over every duty he was responsible for until finally I decided wow, I'm already doing all of this on my own. It took me over 6 years, and I'm not looking back, that life is behind me now. I decided I can do it, and today I am. I have my ups and my downs but I'm beginning to be more up than down. I've learned alot over the last couple of months.

How are you doing? This week Purgatory is away with her son on a vacation so I am kind of lonely. She challenges me a lot! I hope you are improving, I like your game plan of eating right, exercise, reading, and so on. I do that to, probably too much. I sold a wii game and I recieved 425 calls (emails) for it. It really is an awesome toy. I should have maybe kept it. You know, it's good to talk and think of things other than our romance problems. This year is almost half over, summer is one more month and then fall. The bigger the summer, the harder the fall. Well I just wanted to say hi and hope all is well with you.