living together but seperated

How do you seperate while living together? Im looking for advice on making it work for the kids because we have no other choice. She is happy with this decision and I have agreed to stop being her husband and go with the flow. I know this is going to be difficult because we have four children. I hate that I am still in love with her because she is happy to feel nothing for me. I know I have to let go but I turn the corner and everywhere I am reminded of her. Its difficult. Is anyone out there going through this and can share some advice?

by stephn 1 Post
Posted on 7/3/2009 7:55 AM

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Answers for "living together but seperated" (4) (You must be logged in to answer)

It only brought me pain to have him around but to be unable to really 'have him'. I knew that in order to let go and start healing we needed our own space.
This is all very new, but what I'm hearing you say is, it hurts to be around her.
You might find it easier to be a better dad (and happier man) if you have the space and time to take care of your needs; start healing, make friends, whatever, and it doesn't sound like that's happening for you, with her around. Living with constant rejection isn't healthy or fair.
Take Care.

by ReEmerging 84 Posts
Posted on 7/11/2009 6:39 PM

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I am currently living with my STBX. He does not want to be married but we can not afford 2 households at the moment and we have a child.

He's moved to a separate bedroom and we work really hard to respect our separate lives. Most of the childcare is my responsibility but that is because he doesn't want to participate. We work hard to communicate our schedules and social desires to make this work.

Take Care

by Keth 190 Posts
Posted on 7/3/2009 10:08 PM

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I did this for a while also then i just got tired of not having any fun as she did not want to go anywhere with me. It hurts but you will better in the long run of things

by snuffy 36 Posts
Posted on 7/3/2009 6:29 PM

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Stephn, I was separated and living together for over a year with my ex. He did not want to be married to me anymore. It was very difficult so I understand and feel your pain. However, you do have children in the house. I did not, so I cannot imagine how this will impact their lives. The only advice that I can give you is to take care of yourself. Seek out counseling. Does your wife want a divorce? Is she willing to go to counseling? I am so sorry that you are going through this. This site is great and the people here are helpful and very kind.

by valley01 94 Posts
Posted on 7/3/2009 8:03 AM

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