Reducing alimony, child support, & changing life insurance

Hi - I got divorced last December (settled in mediation - I probably should have gone to court, but was ready to finally be divorced from her & SC has a 1 year waiting period. We were separated 14 months before I finally was granted my divorce).  At the time, business was doing okay all things considered with the economy, but about one month after the divorce, my financial situation drastically changed.  I'm paying $1,875 per month in child support until the kids turn 18 (they are toddlers) & $1,000 per month in alimony for another year and a half (we were married less than 2 years).  I also had to let her keep the luxury car I bought for her (but she took over the payments - although I'd already put about $20K into it), and she received a lot that was in both of our names (that she paid nothing for).  We got divorced because she was an angry, unstable person and I had to get out of the marriage - it was horrible being married to her.  Anyway, this month I can no longer afford to make the alimony payment, but will continue child support.  I can't afford a lawyer either (if I could, I'd just keep paying the alimony to not have to deal with my ex).  Anyway, she still refuses to work (and I've been telling her since before I left the marriage that she would have to return to work, that I would not support her forever....I never wanted her to quit in the first place - she's an RN by trade and could be earning an excellent salary if she didn't lack the gumption to actually work like the rest of us).   This was never a situation of me asking her to be a stay at home mom, quite the contrary as A) I wanted to wait to have kids but she got pregnant as fast as possible after we were married and demanded to stay at home.  I finally unwillingly agreed just to get her off my back.  I understand continuing alimony when someone asked their spouse to leave the workforce & their lack of experience has made them relatively unemployable, but this is not the case.  Anyway, is it possible when she takes me to court for halting the alimony payments to have the judge revisit the child support & alimony amounts?  If I could afford to pay for everything, I would.  I paid her significantly more than the court would have ordered all throughout our separation (and never got so much as a thank you).    She’s angry because I have moved on and remarried.  My current wife and I do not live beyond our means and are putting having children on hold until the situation improves, but I am a builder by trade.  Just turn on any tv or radio station and you’ll here that the market is at a 70 year low and still hasn’t hit bottom.  Is there something I can do to help facilitate the process with the courts?  I tried several months ago to take her to court but was informed that I would have to have a lawyer.  My only recourse at this juncture seems to be stopping the alimony so she’ll be forced to take me to court.  Is there a faster, better, easier way to do this in SC?  Can my ex come after my assets or my new wife’s assets?   Also, last question – the divorce agreement said that I am to maintain my current life insurance for the benefit of the children.  I need to put my current wife on the policy.  It is a big policy.  My thinking is to designate 50% to my wife & 25% to each of my daughters which would be given to them at the same rate as the current child support until they reach the age of 18, then whatever is left of the 50% will go to them to split (hopefully, this won’t even be an issue, but I need to protect my current wife as well as my children).  Previously, the policy designated 100% to my exwife.  I’m not violating the agreement by making those changes, right?  One half of the policy will go to my children, so “for the benefit of the children” is covered & it is the same policy (which covers the “maintain current life insurance”, I’ve simply removed my exwife.  The agreement did not say anything about whether or not I could change the beneficiary (and it would be unreasonable to state that given that I have moved on and remarried).  Anyway, advice, help, sharing previous experience – anything would be appreciated!  Thanks!